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24 Reasons Why Your Communication is Breaking Down

25 reasons why your communication is breaking down in your relationship

If you find yourself fighting with your partner frequently, you may find it can often be attributed to poor communication. Communication, both verbal and physical, is how we interact with our fellow human beings all of the time. When you spend a lot of time with your significant other, there are many reasons why your communication might be breaking down. Here’s a few situations to avoid when communicating with your boo:

  1. Complacency – We all can get complacent from time to time. It’s like turning the cruise control on for your life. When you do this, you breeze right by red lights and warnings that will alert you to any issues in your relationship.
  2. Thinking you’re too busy – We all think we’re too busy but if you actually plan out your schedule, you might find enough time to talk to your boo.
  3. Social media – Social media is an amazing tool to communicate with friends, brands, and businesses. However, it is a terrible time suck if you let it be. Sign out of your social media account after dinner so you can spend some time talking and being focused on your conversation.
  4. Internet – Much like social media, the internet can suck you in and not let go. Mind your time spent surfing the web.
  5. TV or Netflix – Having the TV on in the back ground is a habit for quite a few and you may find that this distraction is actually distracting you from the important things. Turn that puppy off and listen up to your significant other. A distracted partner is not a partner at all. And we all may indulge in the occasional binge watch when your favorite show drops. However, constantly searching for another show is a never ending pit. If you have ever gotten the video from the actors of your favorite show pleading with you to take a shower, you have been watching too long…
  6. Not using your phone productively – You had a thought and then it was gone because you got an alert that someone liked your photo of a dog in sunglasses. As adorable as that may be, phones are there for communication. Shocker!
  7. Letting the weekends turn into chores versus adventures – Weekends are meant for adventure and rest. Maybe picking things up around the house in small bits during the week can free up your weekends to connect.
  8. Texting too much – If you spend all your time texting your spouse, you may feel like you have nothing to say to your partner when you see them again. Sometimes holding a thought until later can make your conversations richer.
  9. Not seeing the beauty in front of you – Familiarity can sometimes lead us to neglect those that are in front of you. As people, we all hold intrinsic internal and external beauty. You need to recognize the beauty in your partner from time to time.
  10. Not setting aside time for each other – In today’s world, this doesn’t seem very intuitive having to carve out time for our partners. It’s common to think that, “I’m already spending time with them, why do I need to schedule time with them?” If you are actually focusing on your time with them then you’re able to communicate.
  11. Not speaking with purpose – It’s way too easy to say fleeting thoughts (I’m an external processor, I do this all the time), but take a second to check yourself before you say something that could possibly be hurtful.
  12. Not utilizing your partners love language – We all experience life differently and as a result, we like to be loved differently. You should absolutely know your partners love language so that you can love them how they want to and vice versa.
  13. Focusing on me and not we – Selfishness leads to all sorts of problems in life, and relationships are particularly affected by focusing on yourself versus the relationship.
  14. Not taking the time to make each other smile – Smiling just makes a day so much better, thus why the office clown offers a much needed respite from the grind of the work day. It’s no different in your relationship. Don’t be so serious all the time.24 Reasons Why Your Communication is Breaking Down
  15. Not being completely honest – Honesty comes at the price of potentially dealing with tough topics in a relationship. Get over it! Sometimes saying what you are truly feeling can be healing or at the very least freeing (as long as it’s done constructively).
  16. Bottling it up – Keeping your frustration or pain to yourself helps no one. When you live like this, the potential for catastrophic melt down and stress is way too easy and your relationship might not be resilient enough to make it.
  17. Telling your best friends versus your partner – Sometimes you feel you need to process your feelings and thoughts with a trusted buddy. If it concerns your relationship, you should always go to your partner first.
  18. Forgetting about intimacy – Intimacy is the life blood of a relationship and this is not solely focused on hanky panky! Exposing your inner feelings lets your partner see what you are really experiencing.
  19. Not playing with each other – Do you remember the feeling of just playing and flirting without a care? Adult life doesn’t have to be devoid of playing.
  20. Over thinking – If you internally process like my wife, this can be a dangerous habit that can lead you to draw conclusions prematurely. When you only have one voice in a conversation, it’s very easy to take one side.
  21. Being afraid of confrontation – If you avoid dealing with the issues, you are only doing your relationship a disservice.
  22. Using sarcasm too much – Sarcasm is a useful linguistic tool when you want to lighten the mood, but when it’s used way too much, it often leads to misunderstandings. Especially in relationships!
  23. Letting the little things rule your thoughts – Our days are filled with many competing priorities and often times, we give the little things too much power over our lives. Identify these priorities in your life and make sure they are nothing you lose sleep over.
  24. Not setting aside time for date night – Date nights are the perfect platform to communicate. Put a little forethought into your week with date nights.


  1. These are some great tips, Eric! Wish more people took them to the T.

    I really think point 9 is important. Familiarity breeds contempt. It’s dangerous to spend too much time together. Adam over at goes into this a lot and it has honestly changed my outlook on relationships.

    Thanks for the great post, Eric! Keep it up 🙂


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